7 Killers of Success and how they hold you back

You have the power to decide what you want out of this life and also to make it happen.  Success isn’t an impossible goal, but it is a decision that you have to make.  You will not reach your goals on accident.

It’s not an easy road, but it is possible to look past the life that you are “expected” to live.  There you will see the life that you only dream about, goals that you are scared to set, and a happiness that you are sure that you will never feel.

Perhaps it’s the perfect job.  Maybe you dream about having the ability to spend more time with your family.  OR it could be personal goals such as losing weight and living a healthier lifestyle that you desire more than anything else.

Normal, everyday, regular people can do extraordinary things.  It happens everyday.  What does that mean for the rest of us who struggle to break out of routine of our everyday lives?

Is there some unwritten rule that states that only a handful of us regular folk will break the mold and get to live a life that we design ourselves?

I am a quitter.  Once things get a little hard, I pull back to what I find comfortable and routine.  I tell myself that there is always tomorrow, and that is when great things are going to happen.

Tomorrow is always when that diet starts, when that book is going to be read, or when I am going to be more strict with my personal development routines.

We don’t have to wait till tomorrow to start making progress toward any sized goal in our lives.

There are certain things that hold us back and keep us from making progress or even getting started.  Once you identify what is holding you back, you will then be able to work around those obstacles.

Here are some of the main things that hold a lot of us back:

 
Scared of the unknown-

This one is a silent killer of dreams.  Without even realizing it, you could be at a standstill and not making progress.  Your subconscious could be scared shitless of the unknown.
Not knowing where you are headed or how you’ll get there could end up being the reason that you never start down any path at all.  Leaving you wishing things were different but never doing anything about it.

Comfort in routine-

Comfort in the routine of your life goes hand in hand with being scared of the unknown.
While fear of the unknown keeps you at a standstill, you then tell yourself that you like certain aspects of your life.
Out of fear of upsetting the comfortable balance of your life, you set your sites low and settle for less.
There is nothing comfortable about reaching for the stars and going big.  Your whole life may change as a result.  You’ll have to ask yourself: “Do you want routine?”  OR “Do you want to have no regrets?”

Fear of failure/ success-

No one likes to fail at anything.  To put your name on something and have it not work out can be embarrassing as well as detrimental to your self-confidence.
One or more failures in a row can leave you retreating back into your comfort zone to never put yourself out there again.     
The flip side of this can also leave you stuck.  Fear of success is a real thing.  Over thinking the outcome of moving forward may leave you scared of the responsibilities or change that come with success.
This is a big one for me.  Since I do not know exactly what I want my future to look like, I am hesitant to start any new ventures out of fear of them working out and taking years of my life away.
I used to co-own a company that was successful in it’s own right.  It took all of my time and energy but did not satisfy all of my goals and aspirations.  I felt stuck.
Now that I have realized how this affects me, I have to make sure that I don’t sabotage my own progress out of fear of things actually working out.

Loved ones- 

Friends and family usually mean well with their concerns for your well being.  However, their constant push for you to play it safe can plant limiting beliefs in your head that stop your progress and keep you from moving forward.
Be very careful when it comes to choosing who you approach for advice or use as a sounding board.  I was able to pin point that talking with certain people left me feeling bad about my goals, or even fearful to go after something that I wanted.

Self doubt-

Doubting ones own abilities is common.  We look at others like they have all of the answers or some special ability to succeed.
If you’re like me, you tell yourself that you don’t have what it takes to accomplish certain goals in your life.
You’re under qualified, too inexperienced, or it’s just too late to start.

Lack of knowledge-

Life seems to be a game of constantly waiting till we have enough knowledge to get started.
There is always another book on the subject or expert to ask and THEN you’ll know exactly where to begin.
The truth is though, there is no secret formula to anything except just jumping in and figuring it out as you go.  You will never feel ready start anything.  If you aren’t scared about moving forward then you waited too long to start.

Lack of urgency-

You have a picture in your head of the life that you want to live or the goals that you want to accomplish.  The problem is that this picture takes place in the future.
Without mapping out exactly how you plan to get to where you want to be, the end result always stays in the future.
All of those tomorrows will add up to you looking back and regretting not getting started sooner.
Connect your goals to reality by taking small steps starting today even though you feel lost or scared.  That’s how you’ll know you are moving in the right direction.

I will leave you with a final thought.  Imagine where you would be with your goals if you started a year ago?  Or 5 years ago?
If you have been putting off starting on your big goals, then just imagine where you could be in 5 years if you start today.

 

Photo: Flickr/The U.S. Army

  • Dan

    Great list. Some of these smacked me in the face. Thanks as always for sharing.

    • Thanks for checking it out! Which one has been the biggest hurdle for you?

      • Dan

        For me it’s comfort and self doubt. Mostly comfort though. They say that familiarity breeds content. I know it’s a problem, but the status quo is easy.